Betting Celibacy
by animeaddict47
Summary: I will not lose. I will not lose. I will NOT lose to Maito Gai." KakaSaku. Rated T for potty-mouth and themes. WILL go up to M in later chapters. SECOND ATTEMPT AT FANFICTION-DOM AND FIRST AT NARUTO!
1. The Bet

How the fuck did I end up here?

In a bar? That on it's own doesn't sound entirely impossible. Any self respecting Jounin needs a good drink every now and then. But in a bar with Maito Gai? Oh, hell no.

Is it really that much to ask for? A nice, quiet drink after a long day of pointless files. Why oh why did I decide to come to "Happy Chappy's" bar? So what if it's closest? I know from experience that this was a hotbed of 'the beauty of youth' as my self-proclaimed arch rival called it. And so I have a bladdered Gai and his thankfully sober young subordinate trying to keep his beloved sensei upright whilst coming on to some poor defenceless women. I run a gloved hand through my unruly silver hair and call the bartender over.

"Another one, Kakashi-san? Don't you think you've had enough? I hear you've got a mission tomorrow." I raise an eyebrow at the old man and meaningfully look over to the two rejected men to my right, waterfalls coming from their bloodshot eyes. "Ah, I see…" the short and slightly chubby man reached up to produce a large bottle of whiskey before saying. "It's on me. You'll need it with those two…" I give him signature eye crease as a thank you and take a lightning speed swig just in time for Tweedledumb and Tweedledumber to flop down either side of me, defeated.

"I told you." I deadpan

"You don't see, Kakashi-sensei. Even if I wanted to, I cannot use my youthful charm on those women because my heart belongs to another." Lee says with his usual unnecessary passion.

"Yes! And I cannot do so either if my beloved student is troubled even in the slightest." Gai continues with equal cheesiness. I take another quick gulp of my whiskey whilst they share one of their moments.

"As touching and slightly disturbing as this is" I interrupt coolly "Just who is Lee referring to? Surely not _my _beloved student Sakura? Because you know I would personally see to it that you CAN'T 'make love'-" I grimace underneath my mask "-to her once I'm done with you" Lee and Gai both gulp and back away slightly from me. What can I say? Old habits die hard. And Sakura still very much needs protecting. She's grown up into one helluva woman. She's filled out her curves and now has way too many followers for my liking. Over time, between Naruto, Tsunade and myself, no guy has managed get to her just yet. None of them are good enough. Although Sakura could easily break every bone in their body, she's far too naïve and trusting of the men around here. I'm purely being her protective sensei. My thoughts are interrupted by an all too familiar rambunctious laugh and turn my head slightly... just in time to see Genma stick his tongue down some blonde's throat. Lovely.

"Ugh." I turn my head from the freak show of public porn to an equally disturbing Gai and Lee raising their caterpillar eyebrows at me. Oh great, now what?

"You can hardly look down your nose at that." Gai nods his head over my shoulder and takes a deep breath. Ugh, another lecture. He sticks a finger in my face waaaaay too close the tip of my mask and my fists clench automatically. "You, Hatake Kakashi are as big of a disgrace as Genma.." I raise an eyebrow and deliberately turn my head to Genma sticking his hand up the blonde's skimpy top before turn back to Gai. My visible eye daring him to continue. But I forgot that this man doesn't even know how to stop. "Okay, so maybe not as much, but definitely close! You openly read pornographic books in public and are a known womaniser." Lee nods like a puppy on his side. I sigh and turn fully to face the two idiots.

"Firstly, I would appreciate that you do not associate me with Mr Perve over there, who is permanently in my bad books for making his dirty move on Sakura." I look over to a now pale skinned Lee, who is looking daggers at Genma "Secondly, speaking of books, Icha Icha is a series of cleverly written romance novels. They are written with warnings because the humour and situations occurring in them are things only adults will understand. And finally, my love life is nothing to do with you. Just because yours is non-existent there's no need to poke around in mine." I turn back around to take a blink-and-you'll-miss-it victory swig of my whiskey. Suck on that weirdos.

"You really are a ba-" Gai begins but is interrupted by a surprisingly calm Lee.

"Okay. The I propose a bet" I raise my head a fraction. I always have had a competitive streak. "You spend one whole month-31 days- without the romantic company of a woman and we'll keep out of your love-life..." Gai starts to argue but Lee continues "buuuuuut, if you do give in to your desire, you must give up your beloved Icha Icha series for one month... and I get a date with Sakura" He and Gai share equally smug faces whilst I sit in silent horror. Don't get me wrong, it's not as if I couldn't, I am a Konoha shinobi and self-control is a very important part of that, it's just the idea of giving up my student and books. But then I remember how she so adamantly avoided him and the fact that my books were hidden guarded with a trap involving some paintballs which are a bugger to get off of skin. Confident in those facts, I shared a smug smile with them.

"When I win, not only will you stay out of my love life, but you both must wear tutus for one month. Even on missions." I suppress the chuckle in my throat at the image of them in tutus. Oh this was gonna be good. I could practically see the cogs in their minds going over this for a few minutes before they looked to each other and nodded

"Done!" They say in unison whilst flashing their creepy smiles and good-guy thumbs up signs before Gai downs his drink and staggers out of the bar smugly, Lee in tow.

Oh yeah, this was gonna be good.


	2. The Brief

I am a girl of my word, and you guys gave me 10 reviews so.... TA-DAAAAA!!! :)

I hope you guys realise that I am writing this instead of my Taming of the Shrew coursework... so HA!

Ah! And here come the winners of the 'First Five' race! _*fanfare and party poppers*_

**_Winners;_**

headeranderson only put a smily face buut..... oh well!! :)

Kagomaru likes the plot, and I can't wait to see where it goes either :D

xScarecrow07x was a tad high when they wrote this but i like the LIVE TV idea for Gai and Lee. _5 points for you!!!_

Pance was very nice, and I like your honesty mayteeee. And I think my English teacher would disagree with you about the grammar comment :p

**_Disclaimer;_**

I don't own Naruto, because if I did, Kakashi would bloody well hurry up and show his face and preferably be at least half naked in every shot.

Second ever fanfic, first ever Naruto one.

**_Guide;_**

Ummm.... just that the little squiggly thing in the middle of the story shows the whole wibbly wobbly flashback cutscene thing... yeah... I just made perfect sense....

Other than that, it should be fairly obvious what the changes in text type mean :)

**_Bon Appetit!_**

* * *

**_~ Chapter Two : The Brief ~_**

I hate alarm clocks.

Why do they always have such annoyingly loud and whiney tones?

Why do they always seem louder at 9:30 on a Sunday morning and after a rather large drinking session?

I hit the devil alarm's snooze button with a bit more force than necessary and crush it. Dammit, looks like I'm gonna have to get another one of those after the mission.... I bolt upright in my bed. Crap! The mission! I was supposed to be there five minutes ago! I leap out of my bed and shove on my clothes and mask. Looks like I'm just gonna have to skip today's shower. I do a few hand seals and appear by the window just outside Tsunade-sama*'s office. I hear her discussing something with someone who's voice I don't recognize so I decide to wait and automatically pull Icha Icha out of my back pocket and sit on the end of the roof.

_'My Lord...'_

_'Hush Hush... no need for formalities here, my sweet' he said, slowly kissing his way down her shivering body, the chambermaid softly mewling beneath him. His thumbs hook the top of her silk panties, the last item of clothing on her supple and irresistible ivory skin. He looks up at the vision of beauty before him before slowly pulling them down to reveal..._

"Kakashi..." My head snaps up at the sound and the feel of a feminine arm around my neck. Then I notice a lock of bubblegum pink hair tickling through the thin black material on my cheek. Now, usually this wouldn't be a very bad situation to be in, hot girl whispering into your ear... but this is Sakura. And she only ever drop's the 'sensei'* when she wants something. I snap my book shut with a sigh.

"For the millionth time, Sakura, I am not going to help you get Naruto with Hinata. It's not our place."

"Awwwwww!!! Kakashi-senseeiiiii!!!!!!!! But they obviously like each other!!!! You're so mean..." I hear her whine and smile beneath my mask. This girl never changes. "But, that can wait, I've got something to ask of you." My smile instantly drops and my guard goes up.

"What?" I hear her chuckle

"Geez, Kakashi. Paranoid much? I just wanted to ask you to go and wake Naruto-baka* up"

"Why don't you do it?" She stiffens and pulls away. I turn my head partially to see her pouting in the general direction of his house.

"Because last time I went there I ended up with moldy ramen in my hair and Naruto through a wall. As much as I hate it, he's on this mission and he's more useful to us if he's conscious... if only a bit" she adds for good measure. This time it's my turn to chuckle as I stand up and face her fully. Her enchanting jade eyes stare up at me hopefully. You could seriously fall for those eyes. Then again, her body isn't too bad either... I stamp out that thought before my eyes could travel down her body to confirm my thoughts. Instead I opt for creasing my eye and ruffling her silky hair before jumping over the rooftops to Naruto' s house, but not in time to miss Sakura yell

"Leave my hair alone!! Do you know how long it took to get it right???" I laugh as I land on the balcony outside Naruto' s room. She really doesn't change that girl. She's still as cute as ever...

"Eh? Kakashi-sensei? What you doin' peepin into my room? Look, I don't swing that way..." Naruto calls from the ground below smugly, earning a few awquard stares up at me. I leap down into his personal space and say in my best whimper

"That's not what you said last night, Naruto-kun*" before hitting him round the head. Now I see what Sakura meant about him...

"EHHHHH????!!!!! Jeez, Kakashi-sensei!!! All that porn's damaged your mind, dude."

"Call me dude one more time and you'll be called 'dudette', got it?" I say in the old sensei voice. I notice a small shiver run up the blonde's spine and can't help but smirk. I've still got it.

"Okay, okay! Look, I was just on my way to Tsunade-baachan* anyways, so don't sweat it du-... Kakashi-sama" he bows, just to piss me off. But I am a professional, and simply kick him in the shin before teleporting back onto the end of the roof next to Sakura and, sensing her body stiffen, block her punch in time for her to realize it's me. She sighs in relief before her features change to extreme annoyance.

"I hate it when you do that."

"Do what?" I ask innocently. We've had this argument many times before so I know my lines

"Poofing up like that... don't think I haven't forgiven you for the incident in my flat sensei."

I smirk beneath my mask. Ah, I remember that well.

It was last year and I was sent to collect Sakura for a mission brief. I did try her door (I am a gentlemen, no matter what my ex-students believe.) but there was no answer, I tried just walking in, but the door was locked. So I did what any shinobi would do in my position... I teleported myself in. As soon as I -using Sakura's phrasing- poofed in her living room and conveniently on her sofa, I was greeted by her singing in the shower. I closed my eyes and enjoy her sweet voice. It's as if everything else just melts away. If that was the last thing I heard, I would die a happy man....

I heard the shower stop and a door open. I slowly opened my eyes.... and saw a naked Sakura with her back to me walking into her bedroom. I contemplated making myself known, but then I figured she'd get embarrassed and knock me across Konoha. So I silently adjusted myself so that I was lying down, hoping that when she did turn around she'd think I was asleep. That was the only reason I did that, not so that I could see straight into her bedroom and therefore see her, toweling her body dry. The towel ghosted over her smooth skin, which was just begging for to reach out and touch it. And then she did it. She turned around. And I saw everything. E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KAKASHI-SENSEI!!!!!" Sakura quickly picked up her towel off of the floor and covered her -newly discovered by me- assets. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?? EH? WHAT ARE YOU...? ARGH! STOP STARING AT ME LIKE THAT YOU PEDOPHILE!!" Sakura continued to screech like banshee on steroids whilst I simply stayed silent and stare, which did nothing for the bulge slowly forming in my pants. I snap myself out of it and mutter something about a mission whilst keeping my back to her. Before she can hit me or damage me in any way, I teleport myself back to my flat for a cold cold shower.

And that was how I realized that little Sakura wasn't so little anymore.

"Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura snaps me out of my revire by shaking my shoulder.

"Sakura, I know some men like this kind of stuff, but I do not like being treated like a rag doll." I say in my cool and slightly bored voice.

"Shut up you. And stop remembering the flat incident you perve." She smiles wickedly before clambering through the Hokage's window, closely followed by me. When I go in, I stand in my place before Tsunade-sama's desk and between Sakura and a scowling Naruto.

"Why do I have to go?" Naruto sulks. Tsunade-sama massages her head, it seems I'm not the only one with a hangover

"Because, Naruto, I said so." Tsunade-sama's stern voice signaled the end of that discussion. "Now... about this mission, which you all shall go on," a death glare was thrown in Naruto's direction before he could argue "it is officially a B-rank mission due to the customer, but it is a basic accompaniment mission." Tsunade-sama flips some folders across the desk and we all open them to a picture of a young woman, not much older that twenty, and very attractive. Long, red hair and aquamarine eyes... very very nice indeed. "Mika Kahoka is the daughter of a major exports dealer and is due to be wed to the heir to one of their partner companies. This is, of course, a very important marriage for both families, which is why you three have been requested to take her and her entourage to the borders of the Country of the Rock. Sand shinobi shall take her from there. You are expected there in two days. Any questions?" We all widely stay quiet, even Naruto manages to catch the underlying message in her tone: 'I have a killer hangover so just fuck off already.' "None? Good. Dismissed." And with that we bow and exit her office.

But seriously, that girl was fine.

* * *

_**Ye Olde Japanese Speak;**_

*-Sama=honorific used for one's master.

*-Baachan=grandma.

*Sensei=teacher (when used at the end of one's name, Sir, Miss etc.).

*Baka = idiot.

*-Kun= used mostly at the end of male names, signifying closeness with said person, especially when used with their first name.

* * *

God, that was awful, wasn't it???

Buuuuuut... I swear on RedTed (my teddy bear) that there will be much more shennanegans occuring in the next two!

And, new race, this time...... It's The First Ten Reviewers Race!!!!

Time for a quiz! the winner will get a special prize! _*applaud*_

Which of these **will** **not** happen in Chapter Three?

1) Sakura slaps Moko

2)Moko snogs Naruto's face off

3)Kakashi goes all voyeur and watches Sakura bathe / masturbate

Oh god, can't believe I just typed masturbate.... my mother would be so ashamed :(

Byyyeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!! x


	3. The Discovery

**I'm too poor to possibly own Naruto, so get over it. I have.**

_Okay, let's try this again, shall we? Let me know if it's better or worse or whatever._

* * *

_**Betting Celibacy ~ Chapter 3**_

_**The Discovery**_

By animeaddict47 / Kerry

"…Bloody hell." Naruto pretty much sums up what we're all thinking. I mean, we all knew this was a high profile journey but was there really any need for the four carriages to be atop elephants?? Naruto and Sakura had barely gotten over how big the estate was, and now this! These people really are following the word 'ostentatious' to the letter. And why is the crew all male? Geez, what is happening to today's youth? Okay, did I just say that? Ugh… I'm getting old… and all these kids I'm hanging around with… maybe I am a pervert…

A tug on my sleeve pulls me out of my downward spiral of depression. I turn around to a blushing Sakura, eyes downcast and chewing on her lip. I resist the urge to ruffle her hair, that little habit of hers makes her seem even cuter and reminds me of when she was my little 12-year-old student. I put Icha Icha back into its rightful pocket and rub her bare shoulder.

"Sakura, don't worry, you look fine. If anyone needs to be worrying about their appearance its Naruto over there." I jerk my thumb to the whiskered blonde, who has remnants of the ramen he ate whilst we were waiting for our customer to arrive around his mouth.

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean, Kakashi-sensei*?!" Naruto screams, and then pouts as if he's five again. Seriously, that look just isn't right on an 18-year-old male's face, even if it is Naruto, the most childish shinobi I have ever met. Sakura rolls her eyes and immediately clobbers him round the head.

"Baka*. This is the first time we're gonna meet this woman, so do try to be normal." She sighs and wipes the offending noodle off of his cheek, completely ignoring the blush it produces in its wake. Sakura giggles slightly and smiles at Naruto. "There, now you look human."

"A feat in itself" I comment dryly. Naruto pouts again. Sakura breaks into a full laugh.

"Y'know, that look really stopped working when you were five, Naruto." She says between giggles. Naruto looks up at her and grins that face-splitting grin of his, his eyes shifting to me for a moment. I smile back beneath my mask. Operation: Cheer Up Sakura, Complete.

"My, my I do hope our journey shall always be like this." A soft, feminine voice breaks through our laughter and I notice Sakura and Naruto go into honourable shinobi mode and bow stiffly. I turn and do the same. I stand up straight and look at her, confirming that she's even more attractive in person. She has a perfect hourglass figure, which is complimented by the deep purple silk kimono she is wearing.

"We are the Konoha shinobi assigned to escort you to the Rock Country's borders. I am Hatake Kakashi, this is Uzumaki Naruto and Haruno Sakura" I gesture to the two teens behind me and watch as Kahoka nods as her eyes go up and down mine and Naruto's profiles before settling on Sakura.

"I was not aware that there was another female on this trip." She says, eyes narrowing slightly for a nanosecond, before turning into those of false concern. "But, good gracious, look at the poor duckling! I can barely see her femininity beneath all that garb!" All eyes fall upon Sakura as she goes back into her nervous habit of chewing her lip. Naruto coughs and steps in front of Sakura, jutting out his chin, a possessive thing he often does when concerning his teammate.

"I think Sakura-chan* looks just fine." Naruto frowns slightly at the heiress. "In fact, I think she looks real nice." I expect somewhere in that mind of his, he's helping, but, then again, he can't see how red that comment made Sakura and I'm pretty sure she is thinking of several ways to make him pay for embarrassing her.

"Oh, of course, not all women can wear a kimono." Kahoka's voice becomes sickly as she turns away from us and begins addressing the men putting the meaningless luggage on the elephants. I sigh and turn to Sakura and Naruto.

"Well, I guess we should start planning, huh?" I walk towards the trees on the side of the road, confident that they will follow.

"Ne*… Sensei…" Naruto mutters. I hum and turn my head a fraction. "I think that…one of us should keep watch over Kahoka-san*."

"Hold on-" Sakura begins to object. We **had** decided on who would be watching over Kahoka-san and when.

"It's obvious she doesn't like Sakura-chan. Even I can see that. And, to be honest, I don't want that woman near Sakura-chan. She's mean." Naruto juts his chin out again and I sigh.

"Today, Naruto will be watching over Kahoka-san-" I hold up a hand, effectively stopping Sakura from whatever protest is going to be coming out of her mouth "- tomorrow, I will. Sakura will on the last day. Understood?" Sakura and Naruto both nod dejectedly, knowing their objections will be shot down. I nod back and head back to the seemingly (and finally) ready carriages. Naruto reluctantly jumps into the most lavish of the carriages and stands in the corner furthest away from Kahoka. I sigh for the nth time today day and turn back around to Sakura and nod. She nods in return and leaps up into the trees behind her, I tell the men we should get a move on then teleport into the trees on the other side of the road.

---

A few hours later, about 4-ish, Kahoka decides it's time to stop for the night. Sakura leaps back down to the ground at the same time as me, seemingly disappointed with the early stop. Naruto, however, seems to be all too happy to bound out of the carriage and towards Sakura.

"Sakura-chaan~!" He singsongs, running with his arms spread and eyes closed in childish bliss. Ah, that kid never learns, does he?

"Baka!" a loud thump resounds through the air followed by a yell of pain. I roll my eyes and pull out Icha Icha, knowing better than to get involved and have Sakura turn on me. "So? How'd it go, then?" Sakura says, her voice slightly calmer. I look at Naruto above my book to show I'm listening. Naruto scratches the back of his neck and smiles sheepishly.

"Urm… well…." He trails off, seemingly finding something interesting in the bushes behind Sakura.

"Well what?" Sakura asks, her tone back to it's original annoyance.

"Oh, Naruto-kun*?" the sickly voice of Kahoka calls from behind him, and I watch as Sakura turns a bright shade of red and look over to Kahoka and immediately understand why. Her kimono was never undone **that** low, was it? "Are you going to be looking after me tonight as well?" she leers in what I assume is mean to be an attractive way at Naruto, who shuffles to Sakura for support.

"Urm…well… actually I-"

"Yes he is. At least, until he has to watch over the luggage at midnight" Sakura's voice interrupts him. His cerulean eyes widen at Sakura, then narrow as he backs off and moves towards me, mouthing 'traitor' to her. Sakura ignores this and continues speaking. "Naruto is in charge of guarding you for today and tonight, Kakashi tomorrow, and I the last day, I trust that is okay?"

Kahoka lets out a sigh. "I guess so. Looks like we'll just have to make the most of tonight, eh, Naruto-kun?" Wow, I never thought such an attractive woman could be so unattractive… it's amazingly disgusting. Especially when 'it' is winking.

"Oi, Sakura-chan! Why'd'ya gotta go do that? Now I'm stuck with her."

"Shouldn't you be happy? Spending a whole night with a beautiful lady" Sakura's voice is robotic but there's now way anyone could miss the fire in her eyes. I hide behind my trusty Icha Icha.

"I'd much rather spend it with you…" Seriously, does this boy have a death wish? "OUCH! No, I mean that! Although… AH! No, I meant I don't wanna spend it with her. She makes me feel all weird down here…" Naruto vaguely gestures to his lower stomach, dangerously low, in fact…

"I'm pretty sure there's a word for that, Naruto, one I'd rather not discuss with you." Sakura deadpans, her left eye twitching slightly. I can't help but smile slightly at her. It is amusing when she gets annoyed. Her eyes get that fire in them and darken a shade. I love those eyes of hers…

Whoa, what? Love? Where did that come from? I mentally slap myself and sigh. I need to get laid. Damn that bet. As soon as this is over, I'm going to kill Gai.

"…-Sensei?" I snap out of my daze and look down at the very eyes that started my murderous plans peering up at me waaaaay too close for comfort. I automatically shuffle backwards.

"No Sensei anymore." I correct automatically "Gomen*, Sakura-chan, I was thinking about who'll take watch first tonight." I lie smoothly, but Sakura doesn't seem impressed.

"If you'd have listened, Sensei-" I internally wince at the emphasis of my former title and decide not to correct her "-you'd have heard me ask you to take it. I noticed a natural spring about half a mile back and was hoping to wash all this grime off of me"

"That should be fine, just make sure you're back at camp by 10, okay? We leave early tomorrow, roughly about 6. Hopefully, that should make up for our ridiculously early stop." Sakura smiles slightly in agreement, nods and walks over to where camp is beginning to be set up, a lavish tent already being pegged in by several male workers, all of whom look up at Sakura's behind as she begins setting up her tent. I frown automatically, geez, is it really alright for two females as young as Sakura and Kahoka to be around such perverts? I mean, look at them, drooling at the sight of Sakura's rear as she bends down to slam a few kunai into the ground to keep the tent secure… her beige skirt lifting to reveal the bottom of her heart-shaped rear beneath the clingy material of those lycra shorts… wow, she really does have a nice ass, I'd bet it'd fit perfectly in my hands… and be nice to squeeze too…

Gah! I slap myself both mentally and physically for the perverted thoughts and images running through my head. Damn Icha Icha… **no!** I didn't mean that really! Kami-sama*, Sakura really is gonna be the death of me, isn't she? Making me turn against the Holy Grail of literature like that…and I always thought it would have been Naruto that would finally do me over.

Ah, now this is more like it. Lying here on a surprisingly comfy branch, looking out onto the forest below me, perfect view of the camp and Icha Icha in my hand. How could I ever have doubted you, my dear? You are without a doubt the best thing e-v-e-r. Well, besides the real thing, but even then it's only by a fraction. I smile as I turn the page, allowing myself to become absorbed in Jiraya-sama*'s words

'_As he carefully walked down the hallways, trying desperately to locate the room in which he would find the precious gem, he hears the most delicious sound. A soft, feminine moan vibrates through the wooden door, stopping him in his tracks. Unable to stop himself, he presses his ear to the door, hoping to hear more of those delicious sounds. He was rewarded by a soft exclamation of…'_

"Ah...!"

Wow, Jiraya-sama truly has outdone himself, it's so real, I can almost hear the gasps and moans of-

"Ohhhh…"

Wait… that **is **real! Now that I think of it, Sakura's chakra's been a little off for a while now; I just thought she was enjoying the bath. Oh, fuck, there'd better not be anything going on! I snap my book shut, quickly create a clone to watch over the camp and rush over to where Sakura's chakra is coming from. Those moans of gasps must be of pain, I mean, come on! This is Sakura! There's no way she'd be doing anything like…

I freeze on a branch, paralysed by shock. The branch gives me a perfect view of the spring Sakura mentioned and, sure enough, there she is. But she sure as hell isn't in pain. The moonlight along with the slight sheen of sweat gives her skin an ethereal glow, but that's not why my eyes are refusing to look away. Ha! If only. It's more to do with the fact that her hands are in places I should never ever **ever **see them.

Now, I should point out that the cloudy water is covering up most of her modesty but the ripples in the water her hands are creating, my keen eyesight (and perverted mind) combined with the look on her face gives me a pretty good idea.

My mind is screaming at me to turn around, run back, and pretend you never saw such incriminating things from you **ex-student**, but my body is reacting in a whole different way. A much more… troublesome way. It is with the realisation that if I don't go right now I could be in some serious shit that I finally manage to turn around to go find a hole and die.

"Kakashi…" A soft, sinfully delicious mewl breaks all hope of my escape. Instead, I slip off the branch in surprise and fall.

Right into the pool Sakura is in…

**Fuck.**

* * *

_Ye Olde Japanese Speak_

*-Sensei = Sir, Miss. Technically translates as 'teacher'.

*-Chan = an informal honorific used after someone's name, signifying closeness with that person, especially when used after that person's first name, although 'chan' is usually used for girls.

*Ne = can mean many things, but in this context it roughly translates as "Oi"

*-San = a polite/formal honorific used after someone's name.

*-Kun = same as 'chan' although 'kun' is usually used for boys.

*Gomen = sorry

*Kami-sama = God

*-Sama = a formal honorific used after someone's name. Usually used when addressing someone of higher standing of yourself or someone you greatly admire.

_Reminiscing_

Hey down here!

Did you guys notice the change in layout? I figured it's more appealing without all the text at the beginning, so I'm writing it down here instead :)

But, are you reading this? Because I tend not to read the bottom bit in stories…

Oh, well, I'll just see how many reviews I get for this chappie and find out. Speaking of which, I'm a lot happier with this one and now feel as if I can really carry on with the story, but what do you guys think?

Also, I wanna thank all my reviewers for their patience and encouragements. **THANKS!**

So, yeah, just click on that little green button down there and let me know.


	4. The Shock

**Look, if you haven't grasped it by now, you never will. I. Do. Not. Own. Naruto.**

_Have you guys noticed the change in layout in this part of my chapters? The Authoress' Notes are now down at the bottom. I figured it would save you guys all the scrolling._

_Don't ever say I don't love you._

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_**Betting Celibacy ~ Chapter 4**_

_**The Shock.**_

By animeaddict47 / Kerry

**Fuck.**

Fuck, fuck, fuckety fuck, fuck.

And did I mention 'fuck'?

I am a dead man, for sure. Maybe I should just stay here underwater and save myself the inevitable ass-kicking I'll receive when I resurface? But, then Sakura might think I'm peeping even more than I was in the first place. Dammit.

On the off chance that Sakura may not kill me, Naruto or Tsunade-sama sure will. I can see it now "The great Hatake Kakashi, Copy-Nin, dies aged 32 due to blood loss and multiple lacerations." Great.

Oh, God. Oh God, she's moving. Her back is towards me, meaning she's facing away. Shall I use this opportunity to run? On things for certain and that is that my lungs aren't what they used to be, they need oxygen. Soon. Maybe if I oh-so-quietly come up for air, sneak out whilst her back is turned and go find a very hard rock to smash my head against this whole thing will just go away. Yes, let's do that. I slowly lift my head out of the water and welcome the oxygen back into my lungs. Now, slowly shuffle to the side of the pool, that's it, no ripples in the water. Then, slowly lift yourself up onto the rocks… adda boy. Now, one quick turn then it's freedom all the way…

"Sensei…"

Or maybe not.

"Sensei… how long were you here?" Sakura whispers over to me. God, has her voice always been so… sultry? I turn to see her back to me and scratch the back of my neck reflexively.

"Not long. Sorry to interrupt your bath, I was doing my rounds…" I trail off, better leave it vague then spell it out to her that, yes, I saw her hands in places I never considered them to be, yes, I heard the gorgeous moans and gasps I never considered to come out of her mouth and yes, I heard her moan the name I never considered to roll so effortlessly off her lips.

"And then…?" Oh, Kami* help me.

"And then I came across you in the bath. I was a tad surprised to see you, lost my footing and fell" I knew my knack for missing parts of the truth out was a Godsend.

"What did you…" I hear Sakura take a deep breath, and watch as her shoulders rise with the motion. It causes tiny water droplets to roll down her ivory skin, down her back… "What did you see?"

I cough."I didn't see your breasts, if that's what you mean." But, if I did, I'd bet they'd be nice and pert, and I bet they'd fit perfectly in the palm of my hand and I'd bet you'd sigh with pleasure as I… go kill myself for thinking this way. **Snap out of it Hatake!**

"… I… see…" Sakura's voice is barely above a whisper but quickly snaps into one of false normality "Well, don't worry, I'll be back at camp soon." She turns her head fractionally towards me so I can see the smile on her face. I flash an equally false smile and teleport myself back to the tree where my clone is, dismissing it without thought. I breathe out a slow, steady breath that sounds almost like a sigh and slap my forehead repeatedly in annoyance.

Get. Out. Of. There. No matter how hard I try, the image of my name with no honorific, just "Kakashi", coming out of her mouth like that as she was… enjoying her private time just won't get out of there! I don't dare to even attempt to distract myself with Icha Icha, I know it will only make my already filthy mind come up with even more possible scenarios.

But what now? Shall I just continue as if it never happened? Tell her the truth? Ignore her? Go back there, bend her over the side of the pool and punish her for forcing me into thinking this way? …Continuing as if it never happened seems like a good idea…

"I am so screwed." I moan and run my hands through my already-messy hair.

"Heh, you wish, Sensei." A familiar blonde says from the branch below me. I train my expression into one of neutral boredom on swing down to the branch beside him

"Didn't anyone ever tell you eavesdropping is one of the first signs to becoming a tattle-tail?" I ask as I make myself comfortable

"Didn't anyone ever tell _you _talking to yourself is one of the first signs of becoming a schizophrenic?" Naruto hits back. Geez, when did he get so cocky?

"Well done, Naruto, you used a big word. When did you get so clever?" I sigh as he grins at me childishly.

"Hanging out with you and Sakura-chan all the time does have it's advantages Plus, I heard her say it to Ino-chan a few…days ago…." Naruto bites his lip.

I hum in response, not really wanting to be reminded of my pink-haired teammate. "Aren't you supposed to be watching over Kahoka?"

Naruto fidgets slightly. "I don't like her. She's weird. Like, when she was saying all that stuff to me… and kept on touching me tonight before I gave up and kinda-sorta put her under a jutsu to make her fall asleep-" Naruto chances a quick glance over at me but when I frown at him and don't say anything he takes this as a cue to continue "-it felt all wrong. Like… she's… she reminds me of an Easter egg, y'know?"

"No. Not at all." I say calmly, although inside I'm thankful for Naruto's ramblings, they're directing my attention away from the pinkette siren in the springs…

"It's like-" my attention snaps back to Naruto obediently "-she's all sweet and nice on the outside but on the inside, there's nothing there. She's…urm… what's the word… Sakura-chan used it yesterday about my head…"

"Hollow." I supply, not in the mood to smile at Sakura's phrasing about Naruto's intelligence.

"Yeah! That's the word! Hollow! She's hollow!" Naruto cheers triumphantly but soon quietens at the angry requests from the tents nearest to us.

"Speaking of Sakura-chan…." Naruto begins and I resist the urge to smack him one. "All those guys today were looking at her, weren't they?"

"Probably. I wasn't really looking." No, I was much too busy looking at her with them.

"They were staring at her butt." Naruto coughs slightly and I see him fidget in my peripheral vision "If she was to… you know… act on it…" Naruto glances over at me "…would you mind?"

I look at him blankly. "What?" I ask.

"Would you mind if Sakura-chan… you know…" Naruto makes a vague gesture with his hands I suppress a laugh. At eighteen this kid's still a prune.

"Sakura is an of age, sensible kunoichi. I trust her." I say. Wow, this is my second kind-of truth tonight. I'm on a roll.

"Well, I overheard Sakura-chan and the girls talking a few days ago about some party they all went to… Sensei, I really wanna tell someone!! I'm gonna explode!" Naruto's voice goes up an octave and I shush him impatiently. "Okay, so I was resting in a tree after training when all the girls came and started having a picnic underneath. I know, I know I should have jumped down and said hi then left, but Ino-chan said something really weird." I raise an eyebrow, showing I want him to continue. "She said something like 'you finally got some, eh, Forehead?' and Sakura-chan just blushed! Then Hinata-chan asked 'was he good?' and Sakura just blushed again!!! So, did she… you know? Or maybe it was something else? Oi, Kakashi-sensei, speak!"

Sakura… had sex? With who? When? Why? How? Was he good? Did he make her scream? Did she moan his name? Did she make the same cute sounds as when she-

"Eh? Naruto? What're you doing here? You should be with Kahoka-san*! Kakashi-sensei, I'll take over watch now." I look down at Sakura. How could someone do that to my innocent cherry blossom? Or, rather, how did this happen without my knowing of it?? I vaguely register Sakura leaping up into the tree with ease and shooing a reluctant Naruto back to Kahoka's tent then taking his spot next to me. I woodenly turn my head to her, scrutinising her for any changes I may have missed

"...O-Oi… Kakashi-sensei, can you not look at me like that? It's…weird." Sakura blushes and fidgets under my gaze.

"Who?" I croak my eyes not leaving hers for a moment. She squeaks at the tone of my voice and stammers out a reply

"W-who what?" her viridian eyes dart about frantically; Sakura is obviously trying to break eye contact.

"Who did you lose your virginity to?" I ask bluntly, in no mood to pussyfoot about this. Sakura's eyes finally catch mine in a look that can only be described as pure shock.

"W-what?" she squeaks, beginning to fiddle with the ends of her hair and chew on her lip out of habit. My hand snaps up and grabs her wrist, affectively stopping the fingers twiddling her bubblegum hair.

"You heard me. Answer. Now" I demand, knowing full well I practically reek of murderous intent. How **dare** she do something like that? Who the fuck put her up to it?? She looks away again.

"I… I haven't-" she begins, but winces as I tighten my hold on her wrist.

"You should know by now that I really don't like being lied to, Sakura." I growl. A small voice at the back of my mind is telling me to stop hurting her, it's none of my business, but the rest of my mind is far too clouded with rage to hear it.

"Sensei… you're hurting me…" Sakura's bottom lip begins to shake slightly but I ignore it.

"Well, then you'd better start telling me the truth."

"I am! I haven't had sex yet. Please, Sensei, it's the truth!" Sakura looks back up at me and I see the fear written all over her eyes, water overflowing from her eyes and running down her pink cheeks and past her now severely quivering bottom lip. I made her cry.

I made her **cry**.

I quickly snap back to my senses and let go of her wrist leaning back into the tree bark and burying my face in my hands. "Gomen*, Sakura. I don't know what came over me…" I begin. I peer through my fingers, waiting for her to yell at me, hit me, or simply run away. But instead she wipes the tears from her face and shuffles closer to me shyly.

"It's okay. I guess I should have just told the girls the truth, ne*?"

"Girls?" I decide to play the innocence card.

"A few days ago, I felt Naruto's chakra in the tree above us, but when he didn't react, I assumed he was asleep. I guess he wasn't…" Sakura trails off, her eyes narrowing in the direction of Kahoka's tent. Oh, man, she's going to kill him. Hopefully before he kills me.

"Ah…" I supply a non-comment. I've found they always work best during awkward conversations.

Sakura takes in a deep breath "It was a Ino's relative's birthday party, and the girls decided to turn the party into a mission to get me laid-" Sakura glances towards me, looking for any signs of distress. As I show none, she continues "- I mean, even Hinata's had sex, I'm the only one left!" She pauses, frowning slightly before calming herself down. I really didn't need to know what Kurenai's favourite student was up to. "So...uh… anyways, we went to the club and we danced, we drunk, you know, the usual. The girls kept a steady supply of guys coming to the table, and I kept on declining. None of them were… right. But the more drunk I got, the more attractive the guys got…" I cough lightly into my hand and Sakura mercifully skips the details "At the end of the night, I decided to go home with a guy, Tsukasa, I think his name was… anyway, we went to my house, we made out and stuff but…" Sakura takes in a deep breath and I'm listening way more intently than I appear to be "I couldn't do it. I chickened out. I told him he should go home, he called me frigid then stormed off. I went to sleep. The end."

The end? "So… you're a…" I trail off, not really sure about how to ask her these things.

"A virgin? Technically, yes."

"What do you mean 'technically'? How far have you…"

Sakura fidgets next to me. "Well, we didn't actually do the deed but…" she coughs lightly, peering over to me, silently begging me to change the topic.

"Well, Naruto will come swap with you at midnight." I stand on the branch and catch a thankful smile on the girl's face. I smile back "Oyasumi*, Sakura-chan."

I jump down to the ground and walk over to my tent and just as I walk through the flaps, I swear I can hear a soft "Oyasumi… Kakashi…" blow through the wind to me. I shake it off as sleep-deprivation and get ready for bed.

This has been a long day.

Let's hope tomorrow is a better one.

* * *

**_Ye Olde Japanese Speak_**

*Kami = God

*Gomen = sorry

*Ne = can mean many things but in this context it roughly translates as "right?"

*Oyasumi = Goodnight

**_Reminiscing_**

_Well? What did you guys think? I tried not to make it too cliché, as I know there are quite a few situations in which Kakashi is 'forced' into realising Sakura's sexuality, and this is a bit of a must in most 'M' Rated KakaSaku mutli-chaptered stories but I still wanted his response to be a bit different._

_I'm a bit down in the dumps lately because I had exams on my birthday. How sucky is that??!!_

_I'm also down in the dumps because __I didn't get many reviews on my last 'improved' chapter. Was it really that bad?_

_So, you guys can make it up to me by reviewing on this one :)_


	5. Authoress' IMPORTANT Message

_**Hey All-Of-Those-Who-Can-Still-Be-Bothered-To-Read-All-Of-My-Notes.**_

I know I'm making a habit of all these Authoress' Notes, but this one is really super-duper important, mmkay?

Gregory is deceased.  
And by "Gregory" I mean my laptop.  
With all of my work on there.

You wanna hear the worst thing?  
It broke on bloody Christmas Eve.  
Thanks Santa! :(

So, yeah, I'm currently typing this on my beloved Father's computer which doesn't even have stinkin' Microsoft Word on it so I have to use the crappy Windows WordPad so there's probably a gazillion typos in here, but I thought you guys should know why there won't be any updates.

But, on a positive note,_ **Merry Christmas!**_ Did you have a good one? Message me what you got and stuff!

Also, finally,_** I wish you all a Happy and Safe 2010**_.

I hope to fill it with lots of nice fanfics for your enjoyment :3


	6. Authoress' Celebration

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello world :)

Gregory is back, baby! And guess what that means… so am I!!!!

So, you guys can expect more lovely and (hopefully) ab-fab chapters and stories from me!

Thanks for waiting; I hope it was worth it.

Love ya!!!!!


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